Dorienne's Log

Re-posted from my WordPress.com blog:

Every Sunday for the past three or four years, I’ve had a personal ritual that took me close to a year to recognize. Each Sunday following church, I require a three to five-hour nap. The nap by itself is nothing remarkable as many people take naps on weekends because the time is available, but I am not a nap person. The only time I end up sleeping during the day is when I’ve gone the last 28 hours without sleep and I have to go to sleep; I don’t nap. Every Sunday, however, I require a nap following church.

This Sunday nap only occurs on Sundays when I go to church. After going the entire month of July without setting foot in my church, I’ve tested this empirically and came to a conclusion I suspected long ago, but never had the opportunity to truly examine.

What’s fascinating is that I’m not doing anything that would require sleep on a Sunday afternoon. I usually get a full-night’s sleep Saturday evenings, the drive to the church doesn’t take any longer than the drive to first-job , I don’t wake any earlier than I do during the week and most weeks I don’t do much more than clap a little, sing with the choir a bit and take notes from the sermon. Logically, there’s no need for this Sunday nap, but when I sit down and really consider what is happening to me each Sunday morning, it makes perfect sense.

My current schedule with first-job makes it virtually impossible to visit my church throughout the week, so the only time when I have an opportunity to enter God’s house with the specific purpose of praise is Sunday morning. Every Sunday, however, I run into a gamut of emotions and “whisperings” in my ear that would prevent me from attending church.

First comes sheer laziness, as my bed is never as warm and comfortable as it is when I have to leave it to go to church in the morning. Adding onto that laziness comes procrastination which comes in the form of everything from checking all my e-mail accounts to perusing every single Facebook update from the past sixteen hours, even those I’d read the previous day, and on occasion even finding my way to StumbleUpon or Twitter to really waste the morning.

On Sundays when I make it to church, I must actually battle through all the negative, lazy thoughts and the onslaught of procrastination thrown in my direction just to get myself to the shower. Even after that, I’ve got the slow haul of getting dressed and putting on my makeup and, in that time, all these thoughts of “Wow, you’re already going to be late. You probably should just give up for now.” flow through my head. Some weeks, I give in to this line of thinking and don’t get to church, but when I pray about it the previous night and I set my mind to it, I can usually push through all of this and can get out the door.

Once out the door, a hunger, that I never usually meet so early in the morning, can often set in and all these desires to make pit stops along the way to church come to mind. Perhaps a stop at McDonald’s first? Maybe I’ll just stop at the Walgreen’s real quick to get something? Still, if I focus on the task at hand, I can get to the highway and finally get to the neighborhood where my church is.

My church’s neighborhood is not in the best of places, but that is where God put me and despite my best efforts to go elsewhere…that is where He put me. That said, when I come close to that neighborhood, thoughts of safety sometimes spark. “It’s really not safe for me to be out here” is most common, but even within three minutes of the church I can still get thoughts of all the million other things I’ve got to do that day and given that I’m already late…well, perhaps I can just get there next week when I’ll be on time?

After I push through all of this, I get to the church parking lot and on most days, I’m usually fine once I can see the finish line, but even there, I can still be tempted. Some weeks, I’m almost an hour late for service and the desire to not appear to be one of “those” Christians is deep and on one disastrous occasion, even caused me to just drive home, even though I was already there! With that memory in the back of my mind, thoughts of “You’ve done it before” and “You can always go next week” continually filter into my mind. God is good though and it is rare that I’ll turn away once I get within thirty seconds of the church doors, but still…it takes quite a bit of effort just to get out of the car.

Phew…

All I do on a Sunday morning is get up, get dressed and go to church, but the act of doing all of this is a battle. It’s a weekly battle that gets no easier as time continues; in fact, it gets more difficult the longer I try to walk in line with Christ and, after a morning of stepping around the mental boxing ring with the devil, by Sunday afternoon, I’m completely exhausted and I just need a nap.

I wrote 714 words today (window popped on the screen from “himebrit”) and, while I had to battle to write them, that fight is nothing compared to the one I’ll face next when it’s time to go to church again.

So, I like many other Netflix users, received a disheartening e-mail today about a change in the Netflix pricing. Now, instead of receiving streaming and DVDs together at one price, each service is offered separately and charged separately.

Currently, I have 5 discs out at a time and I get free streaming for the pretty price of 34.99, plus tax. Starting in September, I will have the same service for 35.98, plus tax…barely a dollar increase for the same service.

The cheapskate that I am would normally be outraged at being charged more for the same service, but if I liken it to cable service, Netflix comes out the winner. For years Time Warner had effectively screwed me over by increasing their prices as much as ten dollars a month for receiving the exact same service, without having reasons as valid as Netflix’s.

What reasons, you ask? How about multi-fold increases in the customer base, all running off the same servers and all needing to increase the contracts with the studios? Sounds like a fair reason to increase a bit for the least profitable services.

What’s not profitable, you ask? How about the people paying 16.99 for 3 discs at a time and also a service that people who have no discs pay for 7.99? If you do the math, it only makes sense to differ the services as the folks paying 16.99 are getting far more than anyone else on line.

Now, someone like me at the higher echelon of Netflix service barely feels in the increase at all. In fact, it feels like a decent and expected increase for the cost of service and I don’t remember this big a stink when the previous year’s price increases came to light. That said, if you were paying just 16.99 for 3 discs at a time, you have been rather hosed, but seriously…why are people losing their minds over this? Did no one ever expect that Netflix prices were eventually going to increase over time?

It’s unfortunate that if you originally paid less than $20 for an awesome service that you now have to pay a whopping 8 dollars more than you did two months earlier, but when you consider the alternative, you are still paying far less than you did for cable.

If you are pressed for cash, then decide what you use more. Are you really taking advantage of all three discs at your house at the same time you stream movies and TV shows? If not, take advantage of one of the brilliant other offers available, like 1 disc at a time for 15.98, for example, and stop crying. If you do use all three discs and stream like crazy, then be advised that the gravy train stops here.

I, however, not being cheap when it comes to my Netflix love, feel very little of this new chain of events and, honestly, if a price hike is what it takes to keep Netflix service great and keep them from moving their call centers to abroad, I’ll pay an extra dollar or eight any day.

I wasn’t actually listening to the song tonight as I wrote but I thought the title fitting for this post. I’ve always adored the song because the lyrics just help me see that there’s always “someone” to help me in dire matters:

Verse 1:
In case you have fallen by the wayside of life;
dreams and visions shattered, You’re all broken inside.
You don’t have to stay in the shape that you’re in;
the potter wants to put you back together again,
oh, the potter wants to put you back together again.

Verse 2:
In case your situation has turned upside down,
and all that you’ve accomplished, is now on the ground.
You don’t have to stay in the shape that you’re in;
the potter wants to put you back together again,
oh, the potter wants to put you back together again.

Chorus:
You who are broken, stop by the potter’s house.
You who need mending, stop by the potter’s house;
give Him the fragments of your broken life,
my friend, the potter wants to put you back together again,
oh, the potter wants to put you back together again

Vamp:
Joy in the potter’s house.
Peace in the potter’s house.
Love in the potter’s house.
There is salvation in the potter’s house.
There is healing in the potter’s house.
There is deliverance in the potter’s house.
You’ll find everything you need in the potter’s house.

Ending:
The potter wants to put you back together again,
oh, the potter wants to put you back together again.

I went to church today and even got there a little earlier than I have in the past and I realized that when I’m struggling and depressed, for some reason the last thing I ever think of is turning to prayer to help “put me back together again.” I have my little prayers throughout the day or if I’m ever contemplating that one day, I’m going to die and transform into another state of energy and existence, but when I’m in most need of real, focused prayer, my mind is on everything else. I can never sit down and really think things through and have a full “conversation” with God to guide me through the frustration.

However, this is really just a personality flaw in that I hate asking for help…from anyone and this is the reason why it is important that I always attend church and make Sundays a day of rest. It’s only by going to “the potter’s house” that I feel complete again and can see everyone of my struggles and troubles in the proper light. I’m not sensible enough to pray the way I need to when I need to, so I need to go somewhere specific to forcibly give my thoughts the clarity needed to make strong decisions and still remain a child of God.

My struggles with first-job: totally insignificant. My priorities true priorities have not changed since before my career began to make these upward strides and I know I can’t allow first-job to deter me from them. I need to get back into the Word and read like I want to learn again and I need to shift my focus on being the writer I want to be. I’ve got too many distractions swimming around me and as hard as it is to say it, I’ve got too many “worldly” people in who I turn to instead of turning to prayer.

I wrote 305 words today (last words:then it’s one less thing you have to worry about) and every one of them was made only by the grace of God. I need to remember this every time I write and I need to renew my focus on not just getting through this era of my life as I march onward to my life goals, but to march onward as a Christian. So, I’m going to take the fragments of my broken life and hand them to the Potter because only He can put me back together again and make me Dorienne I’m meant to be.

Pasted from my wordpress.com (since I’m not talented enough to create for two blogs right now):

One of the more fascinating things about writing a novel is crafting the personalities and voices of the many characters that appear on the page. What I find simultaneously enjoyable and frustrating is the physical act of creating dialogue that I could never even imagine myself saying.

In Damen, this comes about most often while writing Corey. Corey is crass, blunt and curses like the proverbial sailor, yet when I write dialogue, I often need to whisper the words back to myself to make sure they make sense, and when a character is so unlike myself that it’s rather sickening, I feel dirty even writing what he would say. That is to say, I used to feel dirty when writing Corey’s dialogue. I’ve now grown accustomed to it and can easily separate my own voice from Corey’s. Damen, however, is far different.

To make him a character all on his own, I gave him “life” by giving him small pieces of my own personality. Since Damen is not an autobiography, however, he is a completely different person with a voice and history all his own. I go to church often (not as often as I could and should, but we’re all Christ’s works-in-progress) and I try to thank God for all His gifts every day of my life. Damen, on the other hand, rests somewhere on the line between agnostic and plain atheist. So much has happened in his life that make him doubt that a creator could have any hand in the machinations of his world and the fact that he has had none of the religious reinforcement that many others his age would experience, has tainted him even further against God and all religion. And so, he when he swears (and when he’s still reeling in Corey’s influence, it’s very often), Damen will often use the Lord’s name in vain.

My mind and heart make great conflict over this. The mind says that words on a page are simply that and as long as I don’t go around screaming “Godd***t!” all the time, I remain clean. On the other hand, the heart that helped me walk out into the church aisle years ago, crying as I went to the altar to join the church, knows that it is wrong to use the Lord’s name in vain in any context. If I’m writing it, I’m saying it, even if I do skip over those words and phrases as I whisper dialogue back to myself and thus the battle continues.

This reminds of when my 16 century Brit-Lit class was studying “Faustus” and the effect of being an actor in the play during a time when folks were far more religious than they are now. The actor playing the titular character would have to call upon the devil to make Mephistophilis appear and whether one is acting or not, there is still that innate worry of “calling upon the devil.” While I have stopped blatantly swearing and using God’s name in vain years ago, the mere acting of writing such dialogue is difficult to the point that I go through four or five waves of typing and backspacing as I decide whether or not to have Damen think “Jesus Christ!” in a moment where he is clearly not praying. Even typing that last sentence used to get across my point gave me pause.

I can’t say that I’m completely indoctrinated as I have only come to the church in the last five years and had written off myself as an agnostic prior to that, but I must say, each time I’ve got a choice between staying true to my character and saying what I know to be wrong to say, I struggle…a lot.

I wrote 626 words tonight (his first extracurricular conversation about a novel since his father had passed) and when a moment called for Damen using God’s name in vain, somehow my heart took control and I’m glad I found a better way to say I wanted. That said, I’ve still a lot of Damen’s character to unleash and eventually, I’ll be pressed with the same battle again.

With only laying out just two major goals for myself as of 1/1/11 (be a better child of God and write every day), I think I have done a decent job so far: I managed to get to church on Sunday and I’ve written something every day.

I suppose now is as good a time as any to set some real goals for myself, though not for the year, but for just the month. A year is a really long time when you think about it and so much can change in a year. Houses could be bought and lost, weight could be lost and gained again, families could be shattered or started…a lot can happen in just 12 months. So, since I am desiring a change (one of them being the current theme of this blog and the state of DorienneSmith.com), I think the best way to set goals is to create some realistic ones and follow-up once a month to make sure I’m on track.

This month’s goal, on top of the other aforementioned daily ones, is to get a least a twenty minute workout at least once a week. It doesn’t sound like much, but after this weekend, I realize I may need to start slow.

I was playing Kinect with my little cousins Friday night and Saturday morning I was in so much pain that I could barely move. At first I thought it was just some new side effect of a caffeine headache, but then slowly I realized that it was just moving around with the Kinect the previous night. I have been so sedentary these last five or sixth months that just fifteen minutes of activity that I used to be able to do at a moment’s notice was too much for me. I was worn out after the first round of games with the kids and, while I’m no spring chicken anymore, there’s no reason that just a little physically activity should leave me in paralyzing pain the next day. It’s time to stop the madness.

A workout a week is barely anything at all, but I at least have the plan to place what I need to go straight to the gym after work in my car so that I’ll have no excuse. Hopefully next week, I can stretch it two weeks and maybe even add a new goal, but if I can just manage this through January, I can look back on the start of this year proud of what I tried to do for myself.

Pasted from my wordpress.com:

I made it to see another year! Go me!

I was just going to post something to have something entered, but then I thought, “Dorienne…you know you need to write something today.” so I did. I got through exactly 1200 words and decided to break my mid-point in Chapter 7 into Chapter 8 after all, especially how I ended the previous part. It just read like the end of a chapter.

I wasn’t able to finish the laundry or about half of the full cleaning that I wanted before I left for Watch Night service last night, but I at least got the laundry sorted and the house straightened to the point that it feels clean, even though there’s a ton of dusting, etc. that needs to be done. I would have done some work today, but after trying to fight the headache, shakes, slight hallucinations and nausea that come with trying to detox from caffeine, I pretty much got nothing accomplished except for my 1200 words. I also played Kinect last night with my little cousins and, given that I hadn’t done any real exercise in close to two months, every single muscle in my body is screaming. It took me half the day to figure out if the pain was just from running around the house or if it was a new piece of the caffeine withdrawal, but when I remember all the running and jumping I did with the Kinect, I got completely psyched to get mine on Monday.

The interesting thing about writing is how difficult it is to get started when I haven’t written in a while, which explains so many of my lulls in 2010. I only went about 3 1/2 days without writing and I had to listen to only instrumental music to help my mind focus before I was able to construct a sentence. Previously, I’d go three or four weeks without writing anything and would then be surprised that I couldn’t get motivated to write anything worthwhile. I suppose one of my main lessons of 2010 was that I have to write every day. Even if it’s just a quick 200-word blurb, I have to get those juices flowing.

Well, it’s a new year and a new opportunity to get things done. In 2011, my goals are God and writing. If I can keep those things in focus, I’ll do just fine.

A PS to myself: I’ve got waaay too many drafts sitting on this blog. 2011 will see far more posting at this blog.

Everyday I get up and read about some new catastrophe that has befallen the world. Cholera, tsunamis, murder, rape, war…It gets to the point where I become apathetic about it. With all the evil that exists in this world, people (mostly Christians) get asked where God is amongst all this tragedy. A question long asked of me by agnostics and atheists is, if God is loving, merciful and just, why is there so much pain and suffering in the world?

I return this with a separate question: Where in the bible do you read that this world would not have suffering or pain?

God is merciful and loving, but He is also just.

This world is full of evil things and sinful people; as people are on the whole evil (think of what you would do if you knew you would never get caught and never had to deal with any comeuppance).

Since this world is evil and sinful, there will be pestilence and pain, suffering, heartache, rain. The strong will prey upon the weak and the rich ignore the poor. The unsaved will gallivant around in Porsche’s and limousines while the saved watch their children die because they cannot afford the health care needed to give them a simple shot. That is the nature of this world because this world is filled with sin.

So, if one were to look only about this Earth and try to find God’s goodness and greatness and mercy, one would be sorely displeased. That is not to say there is not grace and beauty in this world, but it is often overshadowed by the dark, dark sin.

God’s mercy and love, does not come from Earthly goods and desires. You are thinking and speaking of a being that exists outside the confines of space, time, matter and energy. How can you equate all of His wonder to that which you can see and touch? God’s mercy and love comes from the fact that, though we are sinful and evil creatures amongst whom even the holiest of holy are conceived in sin and bear the sins of Adam, God still loves us enough to allow us to come home into his heaven.

He loves us enough to allow His Son to bear the penalty of our sins (which is death), and allow us to be at peace. What we deserve is eternal damnation, but we have the opportunity to receive life everlasting.

He is merciful enough to leave us with a Comforter on this Earth. As we walk about and live in this sinful world, the catastrophes and the discord can leave us weak and weary and unwilling to go forward, but…

God leaves us with the Comforter, who gives us strength and keeps us calm throughout the stormy sins of ourselves and our brethren.

God is just. The sinful can and will flourish on this Earth, but everyone dies and at death begins the judgment. “For whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.”

God is!

God is loving, merciful and just in more ways than we deserve…He simply is.

This is not to say that when you see catastrophe in the world that you should turn a blind eye and say everything will be sorted in the next life. Good people should still seek to do all the good they can do in the world. My point is that God’s existence should not be questioned simply because bad things happen in this world.

When you look at the blessings of the beautiful things that thrive despite the evil of this world: children laughing, dawn, births and weddings, smiles and hugs and love, you can find it fascinating that anyone could doubt that God not only exists, but that He touches each of our lives, regardless if we heed His word.

Fun reading: http://www.old-wizard.com/ten-dumb-things-people-say-about-religion

Throughout most of 2009, I ran around in a frantic tizzy about getting old and turning 25. There were so many things I desired to do before getting “old” and, yet, it was happening nonetheless. Despite all the planning and scurrying, I managed to accomplish very little by my actual birthday and started to get depressed because of it.

For most of this year, I feel as if I have wandered around in a fog, reacting to life instead of progressively taking hold of it.

As this September brought another time of deep reflection, I began to once more grow sullen about what I presumed to be my lack of accomplishment throughout age 25, but in my hours of reflection, a thought occurred to me.

Instead of age 26 being another year of prospective failure, this past year has been the year when my career (backup as it is) has really taken the strides it should be taking.

Age 26 also marks 5 five years since I was saved.

Though I was baptized at age 7, I wasn’t really saved until I was 21, on the floor of my apartment, on my knees praying for Christ’s blessings and all that He could do for me. It was in that dark hour that I found Christ and that was five years ago.

So, instead of being upset about what I didn’t get accomplished, I will go into this time of reflection remembering how far I’ve come. I am not the person I was five years ago and I do not want to be that person again. I am stronger from what Jesus has sent my way and I know that ages 26-30 will bring more challenges to make me even stronger in Christ.

I got promoted again today…that’s not why I feel blessed though.

Nine months ago, I found myself wallowing in a depression, the likes of which I had not experienced since before I was saved. In the passing weeks and months, He has blessed me time and time again, but…

I always found myself thinking back to that dark point in my life when I thought nothing would ever go right again and I thought I would simply sink lower and lower until the darkness consumed me. I often wondered why I had to go through all of that, why it had to be me, why I had to be brought so low before I was able to feel so high and, until recently, I had passed it off with the easy reason of knowing that one has to go down before going up, even though I never fully understood it. Today, however, it occurred to me why I had to go through my trial and why I will continue to go through trials as I travel through life.

To go through something is always worth telling or sympathizing, but to go through something, only to come out on top afterward is a testimony and this is what He wants. Not just someone to say, I’ve lived through X and survived, but a true light to the world who can I say I lived through X and triumphed!

Today, I was able to testify to someone, albeit in a more secular fashion than I would have preferred, and it was not until afterward that it occurred to me why I was made to suffer. Without my suffering, my doubt, my pain, I would have had nothing to tell this someone who so clearly was searching for guidance. With no hardship of my own, my advice would have been a lecture, not a testimony.

At nearly 26 years old, I have had a blessed life. I can’t remember ever going hungry a day in my life and, even though my mother tells me we were poor when I was a small child, I never once felt it. As yet, I have yet to miss a rent payment, even though I had gone four months without a job and, while my debt to income ratio is not where I would like it to be, I at least know it exists and can still make plans for the future without worrying about a seven-year black mark on name. I am an American who was raised during the 90s, who never saw life on welfare or drugs in my home or wanton acts by parental figures in my presence; I’ve lived a charmed life.

When I became saved, the first thing I wanted to do was bring someone else to Christ, anyone! But, few willing participants could be found. I won’t go so far as to say that I saved anyone today, but I love simply realizing why Jesus pushes us through trials and uncertainty: so that we can be lights to others wandering in the darkness.

(Pun fully intended)

I keep hearing all this fuss about Android and how it’s gaining ground on iPhone and how it has surpasses iPhone sales and how it’s the saviour of all things in smartphones and blah, blah, blah…The problem is that when pundits are comparing iPhone and Android, they are not comparing like things. It is the same as comparing ALL Apple computers with the Ubuntu operating system; it’s not the same thing.

What IS a fair comparison would be solely comparing the operating system, like comparing Mac OSX and Windows 7. There are pros and cons about both operating systems, but the point is that a comparison can only be made when like things are compared. The analogy between iPhone and specific phones that run Android operating systems would be more adequate, but you rarely hear about that. This is because there is no other phone that comes close to iPhone in sales or usability.

The argument between Android and iPhone would make more sense if it was between the Droid and iPhone. If people were buying more Droids than iPhones, that would be something worth argument. But in fact, no phone is currently outselling iPhone, so we can argue all we want about operating systems, but the average consumer doesn’t care. Most people just want a phone to work and look nice doing it. So, rather go on and on how about Android is so much better and gaining so much ground on iPhone, let’s compare the actual phones, iPhone 4 and Droid Incredible, to see how the phones compare to the base consumer and put to rest some of this unwarranted iPhone-bashing.

(Sources: Droid-Life.com and iphone-droid.com)

Before I get into any comparison, I must say this before anything else: I can’t stand Apple and I hate Macs. I say this lest anyone think that I am one of who I refer to as the Apple-loyal who will buy anything that comes from Apple. For me, a Mac is stifling in ways that make doing anything on a computer a chore not worth doing and, while something that is supposedly simple and easy to use has a market, the Mac reeks of asinine and mindless computing that allows people to become victims of their own mediocrity. As a company, Apple defy every part of capitalism that intrinsically allow them to hold one of the most desired stocks of the past decade…but they still make some great products.

I’ll say this also: I have no intentions in perusing the differences between Android and iPhone OS4. This is because an average user would have no idea which is which unless someone told them and the goal here is stress that one must compare specific phones and their abilities rather than an entire phone versus just an operating system.

AT&T vs. Verizon
Our family were long-time users of Verizon (I have had a cell since age 14 and at age 25, I’ve still got the same number), yet we are all now on AT&T. This is solely because of the iPhone; if there were no iPhone, we would still be with Verizon, but I imagine the world would be a sadder place. That said, we had only been with Verizon throughout its numerous name changes (anyone remember Cellular One?) and its rise to become the largest carrier in the US, so I cannot say that we tried AT&T’s service and then went with Verizon because we had had enough. We stayed with Verizon because we had always had Verizon and I imagine that many long-time Verizon users are in the same position; the service was so good, there did not seem a reason to switch. Those who had made the switch, many times, did so out of anger (because any company can make you angry enough to up and leave) or price (because Verizon is bloody expensive) and many of those went back to Verizon in the end because in basic cell phone service, they really are the best.

All this not withstanding, the service received with AT&T and iPhone has not been that different from my Samsung Whatever and Verizon. Very few, if any, calls are dropped and places where I am unable to pick up a signal on iPhone are the same places I was unable to pick up a signal on my Verizon phone. My point is simple: both AT&T and Verizon are large enough to provide similar coverage.

One major topic the media loves to touch upon is AT&T’s “failing” network in large metro areas (your New Yorks and San Franciscos), but I digress…there are far more iPhones floating around a single network than there are Droids, Evos, Blackberrys, etc., each on different carriers. iPhone users are also typical in using more data than their counterparts on Verizon or Sprint, so it makes me wonder if anyone has done any true analysis has been made to see if Verizon would have any more success handling the same level of traffic if they, and they alone, had iPhone. The problem is that unless Apple decide to move completely from AT&T, no one can tell if another carrier could do better than AT&T, which is why I imagine Apple are not keen on switching any time soon. It is simply unfair to say that AT&T’s service is garbage when no other carrier has had to handle the bandwidth that iPhone users gobble monthly and, let’s not forget that if AT&T were at the low the level the media is proclaiming, two years after the first iPhones debuted, AT&T would have seen a major drop in customers as people decided, “No phone is worth this service!” People haven’t, which is worth noting; the iPhone is worth putting up with any perceived or imagined tiers of service.

Lastly, I will throw in this often overlooked, but somewhat important piece of the pie. The Verizon network will not allow you to use voice and data simultaneously. This means, if you are lost in a thunderstorm, you run off the side of the road and need to call the police or just AAA to come help you, when it comes to answering the question, “Where are you?” it is going to take the presence of mind to look up where you are prior to making that call because there is no way the Droid will let you remain on that call and take a look at Google Maps. Bringing the situation a little closer to home, you and a friend across town are trying to meet up for a movie, but need to find movie times. Using a Droid, you will have to end the call, find the movie theatre and times and then call again. Using an iPhone, means you can put your friend on speaker as you peruse the different theatres, films and times and coordinate everything on the same call.

Before I am called far too Apple-biased by neglecting the fact that voice and data can be used simultaneously on the Droid with a WiFi connection, let’s examine the rationale of WiFi vs. 3G. WiFi is not new; the technology has been around at least for 10 years and for 7 years on a large scale. For some reasons, however, having a phone with access to the Internet solely via a WiFi connection was not enough to spark a smartphone industry. This is because, despite the cry that WiFi is everywhere, it isn’t. Yes, if I go to Panera, I can use their free WiFi as I eat my lunch, but I still have to switch to and log into it. Going back to the lost in a thunderstorm example, if one is out in the middle of nowhere, can you honestly rely on finding an accessible WiFi signal, and by accessible, I mean not just a signal, but signal that will not require a password? It took 3G, that is a data connection accessible from virtually anywhere, for the smartphone to take off and that is why iPhone owns the Droid in this aspect. This is not to say that this is a Droid limitation, but it is a Verizon limitation and it is also why I snicker any time I hear someone say the phrase, “Well, I hear iPhone is coming to Verizon soon.” I am certain that Verizon will correct/amend this issue in their network in the future, but it does leave me to wonder if Verizon, too, will feel the same snags as AT&T in the network.

Size, resolution and weight
Smartphones, by and large, are roughly the same size and shape, with small differences measuring in parts of an ounce or in millimeters. The thing is, most people are simply unable to look at two items and see a difference of .2 inches or feel the difference in .2 ounces, so differences that are so small become almost insignificant anywhere, except on paper. What the eye is likely to notice, however, is a difference in screen resolution. The problem is that the iPhone and the Droid have very similar resolutions, to the point, that one would really need to study the devices to see that the iPhone has the better resolution. I mention screen size and resolution and phone weight, simply because these are factoids thrown in almost all directions, but matter relatively little when it comes down to using a phone. The iPhone has a prettier display than any other smartphone on the market, but despite this people either don’t care or don’t care enough to let something like resolution define which phone will suit them. Is my bag somehow unbearable because I’ve got an extra .2 ounces of iPhone hanging in there? Will a Droid user’s eyes somehow deteriorate faster than an iPhone user’s because of 160 square pixels of resolution difference? Not likely.

Storage
One can purchase an iPhone with 32GB of storage and that’s all it will ever have. One can purchase a Droid, for $100 less, with 8GB of storage, but can increase the storage to the same 32GB. Now, I know that I cannot readily consider myself a casual consumer, but in many instances I see many techie devices in the same light. I have digital camera and I bought some random size storage card for it a few years ago, but I haven’t upgraded that card since I bought the camera and don’t see that happening any time soon. Obviously, a camera is far different from a iPhone, so let’s look at it from another view. I recently bough a laptop after researching and shopping for weeks on end. I chose one with a large memory, but not more than I knew I was going to need for the laptop and knew full well, that should I run out of room, I had a tera drive sitting nearby to transfer select files. Close to a year later, I have yet to transfer anything to the tera drive and have not worried about increasing my laptop storage.

I give both scenarios to help paint the picture for a smartphone consumer. For most people, a smartphone will be something to carry music, videos and pictures, something to send and receive e-mail, check Facebook, watch a couple YouTube videos, surf the web anywhere in the world and play mobile games. What will create the least hassle for this smartphone user: choosing only select albums to add to said phone, moving photos or videos to a computer or hard drive to make room for more apps or…having to go out and, not only purchase, but have someone install more storage in said phone, in addition to eventually need to choose between albums, move photos and videos to a hard drive? Most people (and I declare this legitimately) have no idea how to upgrade storage on a basic PC, so to go about doing the same seems an unnecessary chore and let’s not forget that the new storage cards are not going to be given away for free. If one is stuck between multiple choices, one will nearly always choose the option that is easiest; this is not laziness or inability to understand the complicated. The desire to do what is easiest is an evolutionary ideal for all sentient life and even force in the universe!

It is also worth mentioning that even if one were to increase the Droid’s storage to the same 32GB of the iPhone, that extra 24GB can only be used for music, videos, photos, etc. No apps or app data can be stored on that extra 24GB you have available. While, at first, I am unable to imagine myself filling more than 8GB on apps, it is slightly disillusioning to know that I would not be able to have an app on my phone, not because I no longer have a page to place it, but because the phone will simply not hold anything more. Let’s not forget that filling 8GB is not outside of the realm of possibility for someone using their iPhone in the same vein of Nintendo DS or PSP. A page of 16 large games can dig very far into 8GB and, with OS4′s folder system, the 176 app limit balloons to over 2000. Suddenly, that 8GB limit becomes a stifling limit that keeps one from using their phone the way one would like, especially if someone asks the question, “What will I use more often? Going through my 5GB of pictures or playing Final Fantasy? Watching a movie I’ve seen twice before or using that giant Matthew Henry commentary each week?”

I have a 32GB iPhone 3GS and have just under 10GB left. I have had to be very specific with my music, ensuring that every song is on at least one playlist to ensure nothing is sitting around just taking up space and I have added videos sparingly. That said, I still have 1278 songs (out of a 3800 strong library), 203 photos, 124 apps (taking up a little more than 2GB), 5 movies, 45 TV shows and 273 iTunes U movies on my phone with room to spare, and I consider myself an iPhone power user. An average user may not come close to any of this, so 8GB may be just fine, but…in the guise of doing what is easiest, why buy a Droid Incredible for $299 with 8GB when one could get an iPhone 3G with the same storage for $99?

Camera
Having used iPhone 3GS for months, I can honestly say the camera is garbage. The iPhone 4, however, will bring a 5 megapixel camera with a flash and better focus, not to mention video capture tools right on the phone. Droid Incredible, however, will bring an 8 megapixel camera with dual flash and will undoubtedly be the better of the pair. Several months ago, the camera barely mattered as I could take (and can still take) great photos of me and my friends and move on with my life. Recently, however, I have started a Project 365 and taking photos is a daily task, during which the iPhone’s camera inefficiencies become glaringly obvious. That said, most camera phones have garbage cameras because it is meant to be a phone/Internet browser/mini gaming device first, and a camera in a secondary or tertiary sense.

The camera on a phone is meant to capture all of life’s little moments on the go and the average user may weigh the great camera that comes with the Droid Incredible an iPhone deal breaker if image-snapping encompasses the largest portion of his or her life. To make things a little more convoluted, iPhone has what Droid Incredible does not: a front-facing camera. Why is this necessary? Because trying to take a picture that includes the person holding the camera with the iPhone is unbearably difficult and they usually come out looking like this. A front-facing camera, and it’s potential to bring a Jetsons-style video phone to the average user, is equally a game changer back in iPhone’s direction. If taking pictures is the focus of your life, however, I would still go out and spend money on a nice Canon or Minolta and stop trying to take Pulitzer images with a phone.

FM Radio
I include this under the same guise that I included the resolution and weight, because if I were to miss this, I am sure I would appear even more Apple-biased than is acceptable. In a generation where MP3 players are the norm and XM Sirius is a household name, where does this leave general FM radio? Many radio stations that haven’t been gobbled up by Clear Channel have gone under as a sign of the times. It is fair to say that anyone thirty years old and younger listens to very little radio, if at all, and as the MP3 player and XM Sirius gain further penetration into older generations, the time spent with the radio will reduce further in the US.

I cannot remember the last time I turned on the radio in my car and I don’t think I even have a basic radio anywhere in my home. This is not because many listeners don’t want to listen to the same six songs over and over again or that listeners have no desire to listen to inane chatter from radio personalities or that no one wants to listen to three songs and ten minutes of commercials. Or…perhaps it is and that is why many people are flocking to Internet radio like, Pandora, or cheap subscription radio like Sirius or foregoing radio at all to making full use of MP3 players. The problem is that the radio is no longer the only method of discovering new music. Between MTV and innovations like buying songs heard through a Tap Tap Revenge game, music can be discovered in any one of a million ways and, on top of everything else, if one wants to hear baseball, football, basketball, hockey, whatever games, there are dozens of apps in the app stores of any smartphone to satiate any need.

I present all of this to say one thing: Does it really matter if a phone has a FM radio?

Battery
The iPhone has 7 hours of talk time and the Droid has 5.2 hours of talk time. Honestly, I could end the discussion there. Simply put, the iPhone battery is larger, stronger and does more things for a longer amount of time.

What is most often cried by Droid users is that iPhone fails due to its lack of a removable battery, but when one is discussing a phone with a general consumer, the subject of removable battery just makes the matter far more convoluted than necessary. Yes, one could purchase an additional battery, but then the convenience is lost. I, and many others like me, will simply refuse to carry something extra just for the sake of it, especially during those college years, when leaving the house for a night out means taking the phone, the keys and a credit card. An extra battery just defeats the purpose of simplicity that a smartphone is supposed to bring. One must also consider the real purpose of even needing a removable battery.

My last phone had a removable battery and the only time I noticed it was when I dropped the phone and I had to spend an extra five minutes finding the back case and the battery on top of putting the darn thing back in the correct way and hoping the phone was damaged beyond repair. To anyone who uses the subject of removable battery as a deal breaker for iPhone, I suggest one consider the subject of an iPhone battery pack, like the Mophie Juice Pack, like the one I’ve got. Instead of having something else to carry and lose, the juice pack adds that little extra boost for power users while encasing the phone. Even better, when one gets low enough on power, the juice pack will switch on automatically taking an iPhone with a blank screen to 75% power on its own charge and, if that was beautiful enough, the juice pack charges simultaneously with the iPhone, meaning you never need to take off your case or juice pack. Going back to the example of being lost in the thunderstorm and awaiting help, imagine the difference between flicking on greater battery life with an iPhone juice pack, versus rummaging through the car in hopes that you remembered to bring along that extra battery for the Droid.

Adobe Flash and Apps
This has been discussed to the point that I am not sure it even warrants further discussion at this point…but that won’t stop me from going there nonetheless.

Flash Lite will be available on the Incredible which is great, to some extent, but let’s not forget that this latest line of phones is the first to truly encompass Flash. The iPhone created a smartphone market in 2007, but it is not until 2010 that mobile devices see a working version of Flash. A part of me wonders why there was all this screaming about a lack of Flash for all these years when no phone had Flash until now. It was not like one could access a Flash-only site on Blackberry and not on an iPhone previously. All mobiles lacked Flash; the only difference between iPhone and the rest was that Steve Jobs has declared, rather defiantly I may add, that Flash was antiquated and unnecessary, and thus, the need for discussion.

As a designer and a coder, I find a Flash-less world absolutely deplorable; as an iPhone power user, it really is not that big a deal. As a designer, the idea that the Apple-loyal are proclaiming HTML5 as the saviour of the Internet is more than just far-reaching. HTML5 is not even final yet and we are still fighting with IE6. Until we can be rid of IE6, no one can solely embrace HTML5 and all its possibilities, so why is there all the talk about the end of Flash?

That said, the lack of Flash on iPhone is, indeed, garbage because I cannot watch Hulu or stream via Netflix or visit Flash-based sites, but for the most part I rarely notice a lack of Flash to the point that I wonder if those crying the loudest about Flash actually use it on a Droid on a scale large enough to even warrant the complaint.

Most of the sites I visit that rely heavily on Flash are designer or artist showcases. Yes, it would be absolutely grand if I could follow this webcomic while away from home, but considering that iPhone is not meant to be a full PC, or Mac, away from home, I have found ways to do without Flash while I am sans computer and most of that comes through the App Store.

I will say this since the emphatically anti-Apple side of my psyche cannot keep quiet, the lack of Flash on iPhone has nothing to do with the phone’s capabilities, but simply Apple’s resistance to customization and, God forbid, competition to the App Store. If iPhone has access to Flash, developers no longer need to develop specifically for iPhone as well as other phones or platforms. A developer only needs to adjust an app for better accessibility on iPhone and Voila! most of the work is done with no need to prostrate oneself before Apple, Inc. Apple has created the cash cow to defeat all cash cows and, like any other monopolistic company, it wants nothing to do with anything that may interrupt that flow. The only reason Micro$oft allows Windows to play nice with other browsers like Firefox is because of anti-trust laws and with Apple’s recent SDK changes and now its decision to have all ads through iAds, it running down the same road as Gates/Ballmer.

In all honesty, though, most websites are designed to viewed on a computer monitor, so the mobile experience has always been a bit lacking in one vein or another. I hate to admit it, but there are always going to be things that cannot be done on a phone, no matter how smart it is until we halve the size of a nanochip and increase its power tenfold. I do not aim to be one of those iPhone supporters who make the claim that “you don’t need” Flash to browse the web, but I have no qualms in mentioning that anyone expecting to have a complete computer away from home is really in need of a Skype + netbook combination rather than an iPhone or a time machine to teleport eight years into the future to obtain such a wonderful device.

The lack of Flash does touch every power user of an iPhone (a family member even got mad at me after I apparently “neglected” to mention the lack of Flash prior to his iPhone purchase), but Apple have done their job so perfectly that, “There’s an app for that.” is ingrained in the minds of all smartphone users, iPhone or otherwise, to the point that the term “app” no longer refers to an application (i.e.: Micro$oft Word, Mozilla Firefox), but specifically something that is added to a smartphone. When something is not specifically available through Safari, the next instinct is to find what one wants through the App Store (that same family member found an app for the same Flash site he was trying to access a week later) and, so, Flash on iPhone becomes an almost non-issue.

The wide plethora of apps in the App Store make the iPhone ideal when compared to any other smartphone on the market and this is the only time where comparing the iPhone with the Android operating system comes into play. I will admit that there are tons of apps in the App Store that are simply worthless, but there are just as many worthless for Android as well. What is so special about iPhone and the App Store is that both are owned directly by Apple. While this would normally would stifle the market, the closed system of the App Store makes what is so infuriating about a Mac, absolutely ideal for a phone.

The apps in the App Store are made for one specific phone, whereas Android apps are made for the operating system. It is akin to buying a custom made suit versus buying off the rack. Anyone can create anything that is meant to be purchased off the rack which gives a wide flavour of options, but when something is made specifically for you, nothing else can compare to it. There are no apps that are meant to take specific advantage of the Incredible’s hardware over the Evo’s hardware, but every App Store app must be specifically catered for the iPhone. It is worth mentioning, however, that with the inclusion of Flash Lite on the Droid will open all of the Flash, web-based applications to the device, making up for the more than 100,000+ app difference between the App Store and Android’s app.

No, iPhone does not have Flash, which does make doing some favorite things, such as watching streaming videos, a bit problematic, but with so many workarounds, it is not so noticeable that it bricks the iPhone. The masses are not going to flock from iPhone to the Incredible or the Evo because they can now see all those dancing Flash ads in their phone web browser; there is virtually an App Store app for every major Flash application, so one can legitimately stand with the Apple-loyal when they cry, “You don’t need Flash on iPhone!” Now, the iPad…is a subject for another article.

If I’ve seemed overly biased towards iPhone, you are right, I have. The reason behind this is not that I am part of the delusional Apple-loyal who would buy elephant dung if it had an Apple logo on it, but because many techie pundits make the unfair comparisons to iPhone without looking at the phone as a complete unit. The iPhone 4 is cosmetically beautiful and is the kind of thing that one could give to someone from a generation that used rotary phones without needing to send them to special class to teach them how to use it. Usability of the iPhone is what makes it a brilliant piece of technology and, so all of this discussion about how the Android OS surpasses iPhone is all for naught. Let’s also not forget that if Apple were to allow iPhone on Verizon as well as AT&T, there would be little to no competition left for iPhone.

I could go on for the rest of my life about the usability of iPhone or the experience of playing music or videos on iPhone or how developers for Nintendo and Sony are now considering the iPhone and iPod Touch as competition to the Nintendo DS and the PSP, but I won’t. All I can really say is that I have yet to have someone with a Droid or a Blackberry to Wow! me out of my shoes with what their phone can do, yet I daily Wow! strangers on the street with my iPhone…that was even before iPhone OS4.